Some Words

I'm writing a blog instead of vlogging because some of my college suitemates and friends are watching a movie in the common area and being rather loud at times, which would interfere with my recording. I'll come back to that.

Over the past few days, I've been told several times that I'm either smart or talented or something like that. "Josh, you must have a high GPA." (I do, but that's beside the point) "Josh, you're really good at Jeopardy." (That's because I watch it a lot) "Josh, you sure look funny." (Wait, I don't think anyone said that. Hmm. Maybe.)

Anyway. People say I'm talented. And it may be true. I'm still not convinced, but we'll go with it. I have two problems with this situation.

First, I don't have to work as hard as some would think at most of the things I'm talented at, so I feel awkward when people praise me for it. As a credit to my upbringing, perhaps, I find it natural to go to class, do the reading, pay attention, study hard and perform when asked. I've been taught to excel, not to fit in, and excelling means giving your all. I also have some amount of knowledge in most fields due to who knows what. Probably a combination of watching Jeopardy, West Wing, Monty Python and Whose Line.

Second, most of my talents are in fields that most people find intimidating. Math, theatre, physics, etc. But when it comes to things most people seem to consider easy, like small talk, I fail abysmally. Or, at least, in my opinion, I do. I may not, but I tend to feel that way. Also, the things I excel in require thinking at a higher level and being as specific and detailed as possible, so I find it hard to make the unspecific generalities that small talk seems to require in most situations.

Another thing. I'm not sure where this fits, so I'll just put it here. I feel at times that I'm "socially inept" because I try to avoid gossip/slander as often as possible, which seems to have become a popular pastime of the social circle I'm running with these days. I'm hoping to change that soon. I also try to avoid being rude as much as possible, so I may seem like I don't want to interact. 80% of the time, that isn't true. I just usually don't have the nerve to initiate the conversation.

I promised I would come back to the movie watching. Being loud and self-serving is not rarely my way. That doesn't mean other people can't be. But does that mean I can't be annoyed when they are?

Anyway. Time to play computer games. With my headphones on.